December is dark and cold and sits on the cusp of the new year, begging me to reflect upon my life. I look back and I look forward, and I sit still and quiet with right now. It’s a bittersweet meandering, seeing where I’ve met my expectations and where I have fallen short or failed completely.

This year has been quite full, with changes I neither anticipated nor welcome. So as I walk into 2009 I am stumbling through the debris of my life, guided by need, and by dreams that are not even half-formed.

Each day I shake myself loose from the bonds of my anger, and push myself towards the faint glow of the dreams I am encouraging.

The sensations in my body are difficult to read–fear and anticipation feel so similar.

Parts of my past I will be happy to have far behind me, other parts I release with grief and reluctance.

My future, similarly mixed.

I walk the tightrope between my past and my future. No net. My sequined costume a wee tattered, but sparkling nevertheless.

Photo, “Change approaching” by Georgie Sharp under Creative Commons License.
Many more of her beautiful photos on flickr