I have certainly sung the woe-is-me tune, wondering how my husband could be off seeking other women so soon after leaving me, and how could he be reunited within weeks with his former sweetheart.
More and more I attribute poor communication as a big factor in the “sudden” demise of my marriage. I am not without blame here, but really there were few direct peeps from my husband about what was rankling him about our marriage. Such that, whatever had been going on for him must have been gathering and simmering for some good long time–until it boiled over, and he was just done, done with the marriage and on to other things.
I stumbled on an article today that is looking at the flurry about Tiger Woods, and his philandering. The title is a little misleading–What Tiger Woods Can Tell Us About Sex Addiction–when the meat of the article is in the question of honesty
But imagine what it would be like if, for example, someone like Woods could discuss the possibility of having other sexual partners with his wife? What if he could have been honest about his desires? What if they could have negotiated their boundaries and talked about it with each other?
Like I said, I am not scott-free here. There are serious wounds from me biting my tongue about some things that I was perturbed or worried about. And it seems to me that there were a whole lot of things that my husband was perturbed or worried about, that I had no idea of. That I still have no idea of.
It is too bad when people cannot find the wherewithal to talk.
